#i love how the poor puppy in the background is just watching them like

[incorrect-ikevamp-quotes]

Sebastian: COMPANY IS COMING! I WANT THIS PLACE LOOKING LIKE DISNEY ON ICE IN ONE MINUTE! Sebastian: DAZAI-SAN IF YOU HAVEN'T MADE YOUR BED THROW IT AWAY IT'S TOO LATE TO MAKE IT NOW! Sebastian: GET RID OF THE COUCHES, WE CAN'T LET PEOPLE KNOW WE S I T !

[fanfictionismyaddiction]

Dummfucks of the Grid

word count: 760

Pairing: Lando Norris x reader

Summary: After a disappointing P6 finish at the São Paulo Grand Prix, Lando Norris finds comfort in his girlfriend Y/n's fierce support as she playfully criticizes the other drivers and team principals

______________________________________________________________

As the door to Lando’s driver’s room closed, the noise of the paddock celebrations faded into the background. Lando sat on the couch, his head in his hands, feeling the weight of finishing P6 after a race that had promised so much more. The disappointment was palpable, especially with Max winning again.

Y/n moved swiftly to sit beside him, wrapping her arm around his shoulders. “Hey, Lando, P6 isn’t the end of the world. You gave it your all out there.”

He sighed, his frustration evident. “Yeah, but I wanted to do better. With Max winning again, it feels like I keep falling short.”

“Falling short?” she echoed, shaking her head. “You didn’t just fall short; you navigated a field of absolute clowns out there! Let’s talk about it. You know I’m here for you.”

Lando raised an eyebrow, intrigued. “Oh? Care to elaborate?”

“Okay, first off, Max. He drives like he’s playing Mario Kart and thinks he can just take everyone out with a blue shell! I mean, does he not understand that sharing the track is part of the job? It’s like he thinks he’s invincible! It’s ridiculous!”

He chuckled, a small smile breaking through. “That’s a good way to put it.”

“And then there’s George Russell, who finished P4 today. Honestly, he acts like he’s the golden child of the grid. ‘Look at me, I’m so talented, watch me throw my weight around!’ It’s like he forgets he has to race, not just pose for the cameras. Every time he gets near you, it’s like he’s trying to play bumper cars!”

“True,” Lando said, laughing harder now. “I can feel the ego swelling every time I see him.”

“And don’t even get me started on Leclerc! He’s out there racing like he’s auditioning for the role of ‘Most Likely to Crash Into a Wall.’ It’s like he has a special talent for making the race more dramatic than it needs to be. How does he always manage to be on the brink of disaster and still finish? Is it a gift or a curse?”

Lando nodded, now thoroughly entertained. “He does have that knack for drama, doesn’t he?”

“Absolutely! And then we have Carlos Sainz. I mean, bless him, but he’s trying so hard to keep up with Leclerc that it’s like watching a puppy chase its tail. Poor guy looks so lost sometimes, you just want to give him a treat and a pat on the head! But he gets a pass because he’s your friend.”

“Right? Carlos is actually a good guy,” Lando said, shaking his head, amused.

“And then there’s the team principals!” Y/n continued, her passion bubbling over. “Christian Horner thinks he runs a royal court every time Max crosses the finish line. ‘Look at my king!’ as if it’s not a team effort. And Toto—he’s not innocent either. He struts around like he’s the head of a fashion show! Honestly, if I had a dime for every time I’ve seen him making dramatic hand gestures in the pits, I could fund a whole new racing team!”

“Okay, that one’s a good point!” Lando laughed, feeling the tension ease with every word.

“Seriously, I would fight every one of them for you if it came down to it. Size doesn’t matter when you’re this passionate!” she declared boldly. “I’d take on Max, George, and anyone else who thinks they can just push you around out there!”

“Y/n, you do realize you’re only 5’6, right?” Lando replied, grinning. “How are you going to take on all of them?”

“I may be small, but I’ve got a big heart and a bigger mouth!” she shot back, her eyes sparkling with defiance. “Just imagine me storming the paddock like, ‘Back off, or I’ll unleash my fury on you!’”

“Please don’t start any fights in the paddock,” he said, his tone light but earnest. “I love your spirit, but I’d rather not deal with the fallout. I need you here, not banned.”

“Why not? It would be entertaining!” she countered, smirking. “I’d tell them all off! ‘Listen up, dummfucks of the grid, stop getting in my boyfriend’s way!’”

Lando laughed, the sound genuine now. “You really are something else. Knowing you’ve got my back means everything.”

“Absolutely! If they try to block you from winning, I won’t hesitate to step in,” she said, snuggling closer.

“Just promise me you won’t do anything too crazy,” he replied, a grin spreading across his face. “I love your fierceness and protective side, but let’s keep you in the paddock, okay?”

[puripurin]

Yan! Llama Hybrid x SheepHybrid! Reader

— Recently, on the farm, a bunch of coyotes and wolves started to snag some sheep hybrids into the woods when they would get too close to the fences. It has gotten so bad that they would do it in broad daylight.

The owners decided that they would introduce a new addition to the herd to combat the coyotes. A male Llama named Lumi. All of the sheep were skeptical at first because they all thought that it was a little odd that the new sheep would have such a long neck and a lot bigger in size, but soon enough, they couldn't help but warm up to him.

Lumi, on the other hand, was still in his awkward phase. He'd recently entered into adulthood and was feeling sad and lonely without his parents there to guide him, but it wasn't until he saw your gorgeous curls and your small little tail that wagged in excitement. Just in that moment, he'd decided to be your life-long mate and started the process of courting you.

You did not give a shit about Lumi. You only cared about the coyotes that ate the rest of the flock. You wanted to start making sacrifices to grow your cult of small critters such as squirrels and rabbits.

This was because you heard from a passing by sheep hybrid that was being transported to another farm about how you could obtain everything you wanted if people devoted their lives to you.

However, you didn't expect Lumi to be so dedicated to you that he'd easily deciphered your messages to your devout followers and your weekly gatherings.

As you walked out of the dead of night, with the intention of killing a coyote that night. But it was oddly still, as if it was waiting for something. The trees didn't ruffle against each other, and the cool wind was nowhere to be seen

You stiffened up and silently walked back. If one of the other sheeps found out about this whole cult thing you had going on, you'd be ousted and killed by the coyotes instead.

But, you were immediately thrown down and turned over. Your eyes widened in panic and started to attack the person who held you down silently, only to realize that blood was dripping on your face.

"My love, I've killed one of those tainted and unpure coyotes for your sacrifice. I would hate to see your delicate hands get stained with something unworthy of your desire... but why... Why do you yearn and look at someone else with interest other than me? ... Only I shall be your eyes and ears, my love..."

Random and barely edit post after months of not posting. I was watch yt shorts and i came across a video abt guard llamas w sheeps. Its been on my mind for 3 weeks and i started this 2 weeks ago. I only decided now to finish it.

You can see the point where i went fuck it because i had no idea what to do with the reader's background so i was like "Ooh maybe they want to smash the coyotes... what's close to smashing coyotes... Cult." Cult leader YN it is.

Anyways below is for the rest of people who want to know what happened after that incident.

I feel better about my dog's death, but we weren't able to get him back due to the poor weather and the fact he was last seen in a drain. So there wasn't a proper burial, but I'm happy that we didn't end up with 2 losses. We had them since they were puppies, and its upsetting that the younger one died, but i understand why they had to kill him.

He's a dangerous breed of dog even though he's docile most of them time. He was a cane corso, and my older dog is a rottweiler and pitbull mix. So not the most safest dogs to be around, but what are you gonna do when your country is busy locking up a man for money laundering bcs they shit at their jobs.

Right, if I'm not lazy enough, I'll go back and redo every one of my ocs bcs im on the verge of deleting them all from embarrassment. Then that will hopefully be a small week long event for my tumblr as im not used to those things. But this might take months.

Also, no won't do kinktober, im lazy, and smut isn't my forte. Anyways bye-bye, see yall when my coffin feels too stuffy~

(soz if this is shit as well bcs i didn't do a whole lotta explaining abt Lumi's behavior)

[minnielvrr]

Flustered

Lee: Felix Ler: Skz Word count: 1.2k

Felix thought it was unfair. Everyone had gotten a turn with the stupid headband. But everyone else was just teased about some silly thing they’d done in the past or in Binnie’s and Hannie’s case, they’d gotten tickle teased until the two were so red they’d had to hide their faces in their hands. It had all been pretty easygoing. So why was it that he noticed the others wearing matching smirks as his turn approached?

Why had they chosen to tell him about all the teasing they’d done when they’d gone camping, bringing up the ‘Your Eyes’ MV, Seungmin and Jeongin even going as far as to play the videos right up in his face. His tongue poked at his cheek in mild annoyance, when he heard Chan’s high pitched giggles in the background followed by an elated cry of, “Oh that’s evil,” and the maknaes wicked cackles as they watched, delighted, at how much the cat ears moved.

Even Hyunjin, that traitor, suddenly jabbed his side, tasering Felix’s waist on both sides and watching their sunshine squirm on his seat in a vain attempt to escape. He knew Felix’s waist was his Achilles heel. Changbin had held his face close as he told Felix exactly what everyone would do to him when he lost, all the ways they’d tickle him, until Lix felt like his face was about the explode from all the blood rushing to his head.

Felix vaguely heard even the staff laughing at his plight and when the timer finally finished counting down his minute, it was obvious he’d lost. “That’s not fair!” He whined out as happy whoops calling for his ‘punishment’ echoed through the spacious room. He didn’t even get to take the headband off, cat ears fluttering to match his racing heartbeat before he was tackled to the floor by a very excited Channie.

“Please go easy on me,” he begged as Chan grinned from his spot on Lix’s thighs and handed the younger’s wrists over to a thrilled puppy who moved to sit on the sacrificial arms, successfully stretching out the poor chick and leaving Minnie’s arms free to wreck the older to bits. Felix giggled nervously, as the others all took their assigned spots around him and Minho called for it to start.

It was bearable at first, with only Channie spidering at his waist as everyone else just rubbed their respective spots as if to soothe their little lee. “Aww look at his ears moving! He likes this.” Hyunjin called out from his seat beside them. That didn’t last long, though, as first Minho, then Changbin and Seungmin started their torture and soon Felix had his head thrown back into Minnie’s lap as he cackled, twisting side to side as Seungmin clawed at his armpits, Channie drilling into his poor sensitive sides and Minho and Changbin squeezing the life out of his thighs.

“Please, nonONO. FUHUHUCK CHANNIE HYUHUHUNG PLEHEHEHEASE,” he begged, unable to fully make out his sentence with how much he was laughing. “Look at how much his ears are moving,” Channie giggled out, his cute high pitched sounds smothered by the screaming boy beneath him. Understanding what he meant, however, the leader changed spots, moving to gently massage Lixie’s tummy in a way that somehow still tickled oh so bad. Everyone loved how the ears started moving even more when the tickles toned down, Lino and Binnie having also resorted to scribbling and spidering Lix’s knees. Felix snorted, face scrunched up to form the most beautiful smile, tears tinging the edges of his eyelashes.

After a little longer, everyone stopped to give their ball of happiness a break and Felix blinked away the tears, sweat beading his forehead as he gasped for breath. The sight had Seungmin laughing, pushing the damp hair from Lix’s forehead. When he noticed the Jeongin, Hannie and Jinnie sitting down near his torso, Felix’s eyes widened in disbelief. “Wa-wait, you guys aren’t done? Please nohoho I can’t take anymore~,” he whined even as he subconsciously moved to wiggle his torso, stretching his arms out just a little more. Hyunjin and Innie exchanging amused smiles when they noticed.

“Just for a little while Lix. We’ll be gentle, do you think you can stay still for us until then?” Hyunjin’s soft voice coaxed him and Felix nodded shyly, well aware that everyone knew how much he was enjoying this. “Who wants to see which spots are bad for him and what teases work best?” Seungmin proposed, and a chorus of agreeing voices sealed Lixie’s fate. There wasn’t any order planned as Jeongin, eagerly took a seat on Lix’s hips and smiled his sweet foxy smile at his hyung. The chick giggled in anticipation, shifting around nervously when Innie hovered his hands over his ribs.

Jeongin raked his nails over Lixie’s ribs, loving the way the sensitive boy’s torso jerked away with a snort, squeaky laughter and now more insistent fluttering from the cat ear band that was sitting slightly askew on the blonde’s head. All thoughts of being good and staying still flew out of Lixie’s head the moment Innie’s fingers touched his skin, the only thoughts left being, ’It tickles, it tickles so bad!’. Innie continued that for 30 seconds before moving to let Han have his turn.

Lixie’s deep laughs had spurred on one of Hannie’s rare ler moods. Cracking his knuckles as he sat down on Lix’s thighs, Han leveled a smug look at Felix who immediately shook his head, knowing what was coming. “Hannie, nohoho please, be nice,” he pleaded, giving him the best puppy eyes he could manage, only to be met with an apologetic shaking of Hannie’s head. “Nope, I rarely get to wreck you, so prepare yourself Lix.” He didn’t waste any more time, knuckling deep into Felix’s hip bone. Lix almost died. Loud, boisterous laughter filled the room and Felix fought against Seungmin’s grip on his hands as he kicked and screamed with laughter. "Oh, is this too much? I thought you could handle it with how eager you were earlier."

“Ahahahaha HAHAHANIHIHIE PLEHEASE!” The rest of his words were swallowed by his joyful laughs. "So giggly, aren't you? I guess we'll just have to keep going until you get all those giggles out, hm?” Han was relentless with both the teasing and the tickles as he reached one hands behind him and kneaded Lixie’s hypersensitive thighs, one hand still digging is such an unbearably ticklish manner into Felix’s hip bone. And that was all it took for the boy to go crazy, kicking and thrashing around so hard as he howled with laughter.

Somehow, in a sudden burst of strength Felix managed to rip his hands free from a startled puppy, hands shooting down to tug at Hannie’s fingers on his hips. Han went on for a couple more seconds before letting go and watching Felix yanked Hannie’s hands away from his tingly body. “Plehehehease no mohohore,” he begged, having absolutely so stamina after Han wrecked him. Channie pulled him up, hugging him close and Felix jumped up, locking his legs around Chan’s waist and cuddling him. He leaned into Lino’s touch when the older gently removed the headband and massaged his head. Binnie, Hyunie and Hannie whispering praises at how well he’d done and how proud they were of him while vocalracha started attacking Chan who was now left open thanks to Lix. It was safe to say that their interview ended with plenty of laughs and giggles that day.

[blackbat05]

Title: Christmas Came Early

Sincaraz, Fedal

A/N: Credits to @schumiatspa I hope you don’t mind but I saw your post about Fedal’s LV shoot and I was simply inspired to write a quick one😬 Other tags that I saw: @jannlitos @insilanar @cissi-sh01 (shoot I forgot other accounts) - I hope y’all don’t mind me tagging please tell me if u do mind I’ll take it down.

“Please?”

“No.”

“Pretty please?”

“No.”

Roger chuckles as he watches the scene of Rafa moving behind the counter of their rented ski lodge with Carlos pleading as he trailed behind like a lost puppy.

“I’m going to make a fool of myself.” Shoulders slumped, Carlos surprisingly inches towards the door to take a peek outside the snow covered porch. “What am I supposed to say?”

“Uh… how about just asking him for a ski lesson?” Roger suggests. It takes him great effort to not burst into laughter at the sight of the young man about to enter the phase of a mental breakdown.

“Carlitos,” Rafa pipes up as he exits the counter with two glasses of wine, one in each hand. “Remember what we discussed about?”

Roger lifts a brow. What did they discuss about?

Carlos gives a sigh.

“If I want it, I have to work for it. Take risks.” Carlos recited as if it came straight out from a book.

“That’s right.” Rafa affirms. He places both glasses on the coffee table and makes a shooing gesture. “Now go. I have to watch this Home Alone movie that Roger wants to show me. He says it’s a must watch for Christmas.”

“It is. It’s a classic.” Roger sees a tuft of ginger hair whizzing past their lodge. “Rafa’s right. You should seize the moment.”

***

“You can do this. You can do this.” Carlos mumbles under his breath. Decked in ski gear, Carlos was determined to catch the attention of the ski instructor that was at the beginner’s slope yesterday.

Building up his confidence, Carlos takes a step into the snow and-

“Watch out!”

A hand reaches out to grab Carlos by the wrist, pulling him inwards and away from the hurtling skier who zoomed past the pair, leaving them covered in specks of snow.

“Are you alright?”

Carlos’ brain momentarily freezes. He recognizes that voice from a mile away.

Jannik glances at him, looking absolutely gorgeous in that red ski gear. “Are you injured anywhere?”

“Uh… no. I’m okay. Thanks.” Carlos barely manages to string his words together. Remember what Rafa said.

“You look good!”

Jannik cocks his head slightly at the sudden confession, curls bouncing against his forehead. Meanwhile, Carlos wished that the snow would swallow him whole and preserve him until the next century.

“I mean you look great on the slope! No- what I meant was would you like to ski sometime?”

Great. Real smooth Carlos.

Jannik smiles at the man in front of him trying to gather his bearings for this exact moment. He’s happy- ecstatic even. But he forces himself to remain calm so that poor Carlos wouldn’t be even more stressed than he already is.

“I would love to. In fact I’m actually free now and I have my break until two. Would you like to get lunch? The tomato soup is excellent with basil bread.”

It’s adorable honestly, when Carlos realizes he had gained more than he had bargained for.

“Shall we?” Jannik suggests.

“Lead the way.”

***

“You think Carlos is okay?” Roger asks as he takes a sip of the wine while Home Alone plays in the background.

“He’ll be fine.”

“You sound very sure.” Roger grabs the last biscuit, taking the empty plate to the sink.

“He’s our son. Of course he’ll be fine.” Rafa doesn’t bat an eyelid as he watches the intruders being outsmarted once again. “By the way, this movie is good. Do you have any other movies to recommend? Roger? Rogi?” Rafa repeats. He frowns when there is no response.

Rafa pauses the movie to find Roger staring into the ski slopes. “What are you doing?”

“Watching our son.”

“Our son?” Rafa squeezes beside Roger to see Carlos skillfully making his way down the slope with a familiar ginger at his side.

“Before you say anything. You were right.” Roger raises his hand in defeat, preparing to retreat back to the sofa.

“Wait. What? I couldn’t hear you properly.” Rafa teases, hot on his heels.

“I said YOU WERE RIGHT.”

[mar3ggiata]

professional help, c25. Kitchen confidential.

simon riley x original character.

trigger warnings: violence, sexual assault, mentions of rape, trauma, sexual themes, swearing, use of alcohol and drugs, mentions of mafia-type organisations, eating disorders, death, depression.

song to listen to when reading this: Si, ah, Frah Quintale.

abstract: It's Simon, who's surprised, you get how it works. Alba is a good cook I'll tell you that. other than that, you won't get any spoilers from me, having to re-read this is painful enough. my eyes are bleeding from reading all the bullshit I was thinking in this moment. see ya.

She smiled and tilted her head to the side. There he was. She didn't look at him for too long, that would make him uncomfortable. Instead, she sat down in front to him and topped her pasta with some breadcrumbs, she then passed him the bowl as he imitated her. She raised her glass of wine he had filled motioned it towards him, but he kept his eyes low. He told her it was good, she said she was glad he liked it. His face wasn't different from what she had imagined, having seen parts of it already. His nose looked like it had been broken several times, his upper lip was adorned by a white scar, on the left side. He had harsh features and his cheekbones were pointy, if it wasn't for his longish hair he would have really looked the military part. Instead, those blond messy locks kinda made him look more normal, more like a civilian. Even his big brown eyes betrayed his untouchable and stern persona. 'Is this… from where your dad is from?' He asked, referring to the pasta sauce. 'No he's from the north, but all the best food is from the south of Italy…', she replied. 'Want bread?' She gave him a slice of toasted sourdough, said Italians normally use it to clean the plate of all the sauce. He was finishing all the pasta that was in the pan when she went back to cooking. He looked at her dancing from the fridge to the oven, to the counter and back. 'You need help?' He was still eating and comfortably sitting down while she barely finished her plate and went back to putting something in the oven. 'No don't worry', she sat back down and finished her pasta. In the silence she noticed the song that was playing in the background she thanked every god above he didn't understand Italian, it would have been embarrassing.

'Come over to my place, we'll smoke together.

Come over to my place, we'll talk, and drink and then I don't know…

You can even stop for dinner if you want, I'm home alone…

Tonight, we'll put a movie on, and will spend the evening just like this, ah…

yeah, ah…

yeah, ah…

(We will not watch it).

He asked her if he could feed Jinx again, she handed him his treats, adding that he knew some commands. He tried some of them and the dog followed, salivating on the floor, but got distracted easily and started crying for food. 'He was abused as a puppy, I'm still trying to figure out how to manage the whining and crying…', he looked at her with a surprised expression. She was scooping the ricotta thing with a piece of carrot. 'Really?' 'Yeah, I adopted him last year, I used to volunteer at a shelter. He was severely underweight and didn't really trust anyone, my poor baby…' she cooed. 'He still gets sad when I cook cause he thinks I don't want to feed him.' Simon gently patted the dog's head between his ears. 'So you work, you do ballet, the shelter…', he turned to face her, intrigued by the many hobbies and occupations this woman had. She was a good cook as well… 'Is it that obvious I don't have many friends?' He immediately regretted saying that. She let out a small chuckle, the tension in the air vanishing again. 'You don't look like you got many friends either…', she whispered. Dead friends, dead family, even myself, I'm legally dead, Alba. He was a killing machine, he was a soldier, he survived the unimaginable, no he didn't have friends… Half his life he had spent killing and touring in the name of his loved ones. 'I do have friends…' he replied. 'Hum who? Scotland and that other silly one?' He had to suppress a tiny smile, he suddenly remembered he wasn't wearing his mask. She was funny. She didn't know he saw her talk to Garrick, which probably wanted to be more friends with her than with him… 'Yeah, we work together…' She turned around from facing the oven and put her hands on her hips. 'So they're coworkers, not friends', she argued, waving a cooking thermometer in the air. She opened the oven, careful not to burn herself and checked the temperature of the fish. 140°F, perfectly cooked.

'Lemon cod, Simon Riley', he shivered when she said his name, 'With dill and rosemary.' She put the two dirty plates in the sink, scooping half of the fish into her clean plate and plating the other half in his. The fish looked flaky and tender, it was laying on a slice of lemon and coated in olive oil and herbs. She wasn't done, she had another tray with crispy roasted potatoes. 'This is too much Alba, seriously', he tried. 'Why?' She was looking at him now, stoic and calm. She didn't move for a while, she kept inspecting his face. He didn't know what to say except that he felt undeserving. He didn't belong there, in that warm house, with all that food she cooked for him. He didn't belong in her presence because he was used to ruin nice things, he wasn't used to them, he hadn't had a home cooked meal in a while, and he could't get used to the feeling. He was scared he was going to like it. 'You got too much stuff…', she interrupted him.

'Are you not hungry?'

'Yes, I am but…'

She went on again, 'Do you not like it?'

'No no I do, it's just…'

'Then eat it.' She was serious, she wasn't smiling anymore. She understood why he felt that way. She understood this probably wasn't his thing. She bought what she wanted to cook, she cooked because she like it. She suspected he wasn't really used to people taking care of him or doing nice things for him. 'It's Christmas Simon', she said, her voice soft again. Her eyes looked full of sadness for a second. 'I've spent Christmas alone for the past six years. And I think you know how it feels to be alone…' She sat down, he looked at her feeling petrified and exposed, was she fucking psychoanalysing him? 'I'm really glad you're here and I hope you like what I made, I made it because I wanted to.' He spent way too much time thinking about an answer and could only come up with a shitty one. He tried to not think of her words and get them out of his head as fast as possible. You don't know the first thing about me Alba, don't compare your trauma to mine. 'I'll pay you back, you probably spent way too much on food…'

'Oh, wait till I tell you I got you a present as well.'

notes: yes, the song really goes, yeah, ah… you can hear it. If we end up in my bed it's a coincidence, but don't say you tripped…

notes: incredibly sad update, I'm running out of planned chapters... and, I'm going on holiday soon and uni is getting busy again. soo maybe expect me to update not so frequently. BUT we've got so much to cover don't worry!!

taglist:

@ghostlythots @sweetfemmefatal @natxpat @chavarriakeren647 @ravenmoore14 @farther-than-pleiades @internallyscreamings @hwromi @atoxicrat @cuti3maddi3 @deafeningkittenblaze @its-celeste @serene-hills @lexidoll12 @poohkie90 @lunatiquess

@warmedbythebody @katzykat @iristhemuse @azkza @keiraslayz @abbyandermine @jennyjencakes @dest-nai @corset-briefs @nutze-kekse @ilytsukiw @b3anspr0ut

@pondsblog @missyouzoe @fallenkitten @bigauthorrascalturkey @bethtay @angelynn-nicole @starluv @stargirlisworld @giyuuslittleslut @impossiblecupcakelight

@rkrivees-blog @ghosts-hoe @kam1snotverysmart @gauky76 @freyjaaasstuff @spicyspicyliving @scottpilgrimvsmyfists @courtney0-0 @shinchanboi @darling006 @my-therapist-hates-me

[hikennosabo]

#tristampparty day 2, episode 2: the running man

day 2 of @tristampparty!! i have less to say about this episode than the first one so hopefully this will be a shorter post than yesterday LOL

iirc this is 98 knives's seiyuu on the radio, right?!!! i am only about halfway through my jp 98 watch and can't recognize him by ear (yet) but i think it's very neat that the original seiyuus have cameos :')

also vash keeping the photo with him What If I Ate Rocks

he is such a kicked puppy of a man

why does roberto say revenge. what does he mean. what does he know. what has he figured out from knowing vash for maybe like a few hours. or is he just throwing that out there without realizing how close he is to the truth. partially, anyway. he didn't guess the savior complex part.

i'm not entirely sure what meryl means by honor...? but money is a pretty normal reason to want a plant, as we've seen and as we'll continue to see.

i like how meryl has a fear of bugs... i can relate lol. i think this character trait comes from the manga when she was kidnapped by zazie and was grossed out? i think here it also serves to reinforce her being sheltered, still unfamiliar with the world at large since worms are everywhere--WAIT HOLD ON.

PAUSE. ZOOM. ENHANCE.

RAI-DEI SPOTTED?!?!??!?! this rewatch is becoming an I Spy game with the wanted posters, jfc.

man i'm so glad i finally downloaded tristamp so i can appreciate the visuals without the crunchiness of streaming video... i can't do the animation justice with just screenshots but i love watching vash scamper around like a... i don't know. he scampers like a cockroach in 98, but this is giving a different vibe. like a... something. like a creature.

i also want to take a second to appreciate how gorgeous the backgrounds are, like,

i loooove the backgrounds, it looks like... maybe a mix of markers and colored pencil... i love the detail and the colors are so pleasing. this is such a gorgeous anime to look at, i don't know how anyone could possibly say it looks bad without them just blindly hating it because it's 3dcg. god i'm getting so distracted looking at the backgrounds that i'm missing the action AND the subtitles LOL

wasn't there a post somewhere that actually calculated how much a bullet is worth based on this information. i don't remember what conclusion it came to. but i'm thinking either food is expensive (tbh, likely) or bullets are inexpensive and vash is just poor (also likely). also it's funny that the dub changed this to donuts. ...where are the donuts at in tristamp anyway...

roberto lmao 😭😭😭😭😭 i guess that's one way to guarantee it doesn't spill

roberto up until this point has acted like meryl is dragging him along unwillingly, but here he's the one telling meryl to get in the car so they can get a move on, lol. yeah yeah we all already know he's actually a softie and that he really cares underneath his aloof demeanor.

which brings us to this scene... i don't want to say that he has vash "all figured out" because obviously he doesn't, but he's got SOME of vash figured out at least. definitely more than meryl atp. he knows vash is running from knives... i wonder how this conversation would have gone if they weren't interrupted.

yeah i don't really have that much to say about this ep, relatively speaking... i don't have any deep thoughts about the nebraskas, they're just comic relief villains anyway, i don't care about them that much, even though tristamp kind of tries to make us care a little bit by the end of this episode...

next episode is gonna be a doozy though. ohohohohohoho.

[buckyalpine]

Hey honey ! I was wondering how are Bucky and reader from “Pocket Angel” 🙃

Original Concept here 

They are doing amazing okay, let's see what's been going on since the team met you. The team loves you just as much. They love the softness you bring out of him and the sweet energy you have every time you’re around. The name baby bear stuck. You call him many things but the team can't get over baby bear, its adorable, it suits him perfectly and at this point Bucky doesn't even mind that everyone calls him that now too. He responds to it and it makes you giggle each time because he doesn’t even realize they hardly use his name anymore. 

They cannot get over how much of a softie he is just for you. They think it’s the most precious thing in the world because he’s such a puppy when it comes to you, he becomes so pouty if he’s away from you for too long. If he’s on a mission away from you, you’re the only thing he’s thinking about. 

"I miss y/n"

“Y/n would like this” 

“Why so grumpy baby bear” 

“I can’t sleep without y/n”

When he finally gets to see you again, he’s the first one off the jet. 

"Angel!" He grins, running over to you and scooping you into his arms, showering you with 100s of kisses, taking you straight to his room for all the sexy times and cuddles. 

Seeing Bucky soft was one thing but it’s also just seeing him happy and relaxed that gets them every time. Especially when they saw Bucky around the kitchen, baking with you, flour on his cheeks, icing on his nose. You’re both focused on icing sugar cookies, making each one look like a different Avenger, meanwhile the team pauses the movie they were watching because you and Bucky are so much cuter to watch. 

On more than one occasion, the team has taken the long way to get to a different floor than cutting through he living room because Bucky had dimmed the lights, 40's music playing in the background while he sways and dances with you. He didn't mind if people walked by but no one ever wanted to interrupt your adorable little bubble, where he has you wrapped in his arms, dancing with you. 

"You're my sunshine" He whispers to you, his forehead resting on yours, giving you all the soft kisses while dipping and twirling you. 

“You’re my baby bear” You whisper back, burying yourself in the warmth of his chest. 

Steve and Sam and have been sneakily capturing little moments with you and Bucky; the best pictures that would make a cute photo album for the day you get married because everyone knows it’s going to happen. 

Pictures with you both asleep in your pillow fort.

Pictures with you both walking on the beach. 

The both of you baking.

You’re little dances in the middle of the living room.

Bucky painting your toes.

Bucky giving you piggy backs.

Bucky snuggled up with your hoodie, using it as a pillow on the jet. 

You’re both too adorable for words, and he’s so in love with you. The team is happy to see him glowing and finally living. 

So so in love. 

His little pocket angel is everything to him. 

Imagine what would happen if something happened to his pocket angel. 

Tags:

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[introvertedelf]

The Mundane and the Shadowhunter

Chapter 2

Read chapter 1 here

Warning(s): Implied fat shaming, reader was bullied, Alec falling for a fem!reader

YOUR POV

♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎♥︎

“Here is your room,” Isabel opened the wooden door to reveal another elegant room that looked a lot like hers. All handcrafted wooden furniture, a lavish bedspread, gilded walls. You couldn’t lie that while you were a tad bit angry that you were being forced to stay here, it was the nicest luxury you’d ever known.

“Before you get comfortable, Alec is going to run you to your apartment so that you can pick up your things. And you cat,” she laughed softly, putting her hand on your back again to lead you out of your new room.

“Why can’t *you* take me?” You used your best puppy eyes on her, only to make the dark haired woman laugh yet again.

“Because *I* have a hot date in five minutes. He’s a fairy.” She must have known that I’d get a rise out of the fact that she just acknowledged that fairies are real.

“Wait—fairy’s? Like the Grimm’s fairytale ones?”

“Oh no, they’re like men, but with pointy ears and big, long—“

“Izzy, that’s enough,” Alec rolled his eyes at her almost-crude remark. He turned to me.

“Ignore her. Come on,” he grabbed my wrist nearly making me trip on my own feet as he drug me along with him.

“Have fun!” Isabel called after us.

We were soon outside of the institute, and I wanted to bombard the guy with questions.

“So why the f—“

“Mundane, I’m invisible. If you start talking to me out here in front of all of these peoples, you’re going to look like you’re insane. So zip it before we get to your apartment.”

“But wait, don’t you need my address?” I was confused, he’d turned the right way to go to my home and everything.

“I already know,” he said as though it was obvious that he pretty much did an in-depth background check on me.

“Stalker,” I grumbled, actually getting a soft, airy laugh out of the tall man.

About ten more minutes of silence endured until we finally got to my old beat up apartment.

“Well. This is is,” my cheeks blushed, embarrassed. Alec and the others all lived in such a fancy place. He must have thought my place was a dump.

As soon as I opened the door, Simba, my cat was there to greet me.

“Simbiesss!” I picked up the rather plump tabby, kissing him and scratching him behind the ears. He jumped down from my arms. Going to Alex’s leg and rubbing up next to it.

“What the hell, Simba? What a traitor,” I shook my head in disbelief. Alec reached down, giving him endless pets.

“I love cats,” he stated.

“No shit,” I replied sarcastically, earning a look of warning from Alec.

“Alright, get your necessities.”

I ran to my room, throwing pajamas, shirts, jeans, leggings, bras, and underwear into a suitcase, all while Alec kept petting Simba.

I remembered my safe that I kept on top of the kitchen cabinet, and tried to reach it. *Dammit.* I had normally used a step stool, but I had no idea where it was. After some more struggling, Alec finally pushed me out of the way.

Effortlessly, and of course all while staring at me in a cocky manner, he retrieved my safe.

“Must be nice,” I fake pouted. He made a fake sad at me in return.

“Aw, poor thing.” I didn’t know why, but even that fake look of sympathy and that soft tone from Alec made me want to kiss him. Before I could ponder it any longer, I snatched the safe from him harshly.

“You’re welcome, Y/N. You’re welcome.”

I finished grabbing the last of my things as Alec helped me get them. I didn’t realize how heavy I’d packed a couple bags, so he got them for me. Plus, it was nice to see his muscles ripple. *Dammit.*

The walk back to the institute was silent, with an occasional low chuckle from Alec as he found it amusing to watch me struggle with a particularly difficult to pull suitcase.

When we arrived, it was just me, Alec, a red haired and blonde haired shadow Hunter.

“Y/N, this is Clary and Jace,” he said on the way of going upstairs to put my things in my room. I waved awkwardly at them as Jace nodded and Clary smiled at me.

To escape the awkwardness, I ran upstairs as fast as I could, storming past Alec and throwing my things on the floor. I practically ran to me bed, crashing down on it in exhaustion.

Alec looked my way, crossing his arms. “Maybe if you weren’t out of shape, that simple trip would have been easier.”

*Ouch*. Your size had always been a sensitive spot. From being bullied in school, remarks from family members, past boyfriends. You didn’t know you were crying until you felt a salty tear drop escape past your lips.

“Y/N—“ Alec walked over to you, putting a hand on your arm soothingly. I shrugged him off, hiding my face and sobbing more. *Fuck*, I looked like such a sensitive girl right now.

“Hey, please look at me. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it like that. You’re beautiful,” he said, rubbing your arm more.

“You’re fucking l-lying,” you mumbled, still not looking at him.

What he did next shocked you. He got on top of you in a flash, pinning your arms down to your sides as he leaned over you.

“I’m not lying. You’re gorgeous…” his eyes dropped to your lips, and just as quickly back up to your eyes.

Suddenly, he was off of you. He backed up slowly, as if a million thoughts raced through his mind as he walked out, shutting your door behind him and leaving you alone.

What the hell just happened? Did your breath smell bad or something? Did he realize what he was doing?

Nonetheless, he left you on your bed, head in your hands as you only sobbed harder.

You must have passed out, because you woke up to feel Izzy shaking you gently.

“Y/N, hey. Alec told me what happened, he really is sorry. He didn’t mean it, are you okay honey?” She pushed your hair out of your face, and your eyebrows crumpled together.

“I fucking hate him,” you spat, Isabel’s eyes widening. You could have sworn that behind the cracked door, you caught a glimpse of sudden movement upon saying those four words.

[astaroth1357]

Demigod MC Series: Hestia

This is another eternally virgin goddess, so we're doing another pseudo-demigod by adoption (like we did with Athena).

Demigod MC: Intro, Aphrodite, Hermes, Hades, Dionysus, Demeter, Athena, Hades Pt. 2, Poseidon, Ares, Hestia

Hestia is the goddess of the Hearth, Home, Architecture, Domesticity, Family, and the State. She's high up there (firstborn of Rhea and Cronus), but several factors have led to her falling into the background when compared to the other (flashier) Olympians. She swore to never marry, rejecting proposals from both Poseidon and Apollo, and is something of an antithesis to Aphrodite.

Lucifer

Honestly? He thought they were exactly what they were after. A weak human with no experience in the magical world what-so-ever.

Well… He was half-right.

On the surface, this is a pretty weak human. They don't have super flashy powers or a divine birth from the gods… but they do have a very protective adoptive mother.

The brothers had just settled in for their first dinner with the new human when the goddess herself strolled into their dining room, asked who was in charge, then dragged Lucifer away by the ear!

She's not even his mother, yet he felt the intense urge to apologize and put himself in his own room… Oh, the humiliation… at least she did the same to Diavolo…

The Prince was only able to calm her down by promising absolutely NO harm would come to her child… on their heads...

By the time the goddess finally let him go, Lucifer was about ready to shackle the MC to his wrist so nothing could touch them but he settled on keeping them with him like an assistant of sorts. They were in charge of helping him with the paperwork so he could keep an eye on them. 

What he didn’t expect was for them to be so… good at it? They could keep his offices clean, they managed his daily schedule, fixed up the House, and still have time to bring him tea and sweets every night!

They could even reign in his brothers somehow… They weren't strong or intimidating, but one or two mildly unhappy words out of them and everybody would be on their best behavior.

Was everyone positive they're only human...?

As much as he hated to admit, he may have a slight deep case of falling for the housekeeper… He would make a move, but well…

He has Beel to contend with first.

Mammon

Okay so, watching Lucifer get dragged out by the ear just like Raphael used to do to him was hilarious!!! The whole room got a good laugh! 🤣

Until Hestia glared at them and suddenly they all felt like they'd disappointed someone important….

And all that fuss over some dumb human??

So what if they made amazing food?

So what if they could clean the entire mansion in a day?

So what if they were the walking equivalent to a warm cup of cocoa on a winter's day??

So what if they were just the kindest, sweetest thing in this godforsaken hellscape and he would throw himself in front of a bus to keep them safe-

-Wait, when did that happen?!?

Seriously, Mammon's attachment to the MC came out of NOWHERE to him. One day, he was threatening to eat their soul and the next he's freaking out when they stub their toe!

He swears they have to have some kind of magic about them! A charm, or a spell, or… their lovable smile and warm, loving hugs...! 😊

Damnit!! They're too cute!! He needs them to go away but also never leave, thanks. 😒

In all seriousness, though their kind nature puts Mammon's tsundere self at a bit of a disadvantage, his protective instincts shoot through the roof whenever they're involved.

Naturally, that means his day is spent running them away from hungry lesser demons or shielding them from Beel and Lucifer's tug-of-war matches… He's a busy guy these days. 😖

Leviathan 

They're so… so… MOE!!!

That was his immediate thought when Mammon brought them home. He was expecting a defenseless human, but not one that could have stepped out of one of his slice-of-life manga!

To be honest, his instant thought was try and find a place to sit them on his shelves with the rest of the adorable characters he loves… 😅

And that was before they even opened their mouth! Five words into their introduction and he was ready to get their face on a t-shirt!!

Honestly, combine their natural cuteness with their household skills and they made for perfect waifu/husbando material… 

Not helped by the fact they found one of his maid/butler outfits while doing the laundry one day. Not only did they ask if they could wear it, they actually non-ironically liked it and started wearing it around the House!!

Oh he got cornered by Beel, Lucifer, and Mammon separately that day because they thought he was using them for fetish fuel… But it was their idea, he swears!!

I mean… He didn't discourage them or anything either but still…

If Beel hadn't claimed them on Day One, Levi might have eventually thrown his hat in the ring too... Oh well… he can pine from a distance… What else is new? 😔

Satan

He has a video of Hestia dragging Lucifer out of the dining room on his phone and it's one of his most treasured possessions now. 😌

He is perhaps the only person in the House who was not at all impressed with their little human.

So they could cook? So could he. So they can clean? That's not impressive. They could manage a household? Big deal, he's more or less been in charge of the same thing for centuries!

As far as he saw it, there was nothing the MC could do that he couldn't do as proficiently or even better. There was nothing remarkable about this human at all!

… except for one thing.

That maid/butler outfit of Levi's? The one they like to wear around?

It has cat accessories…

Either they don't notice or they don't mind it but they essentially walk around the House cleaning things with little kitty ears attached to their head and a bell on their collar…

Dammit… Why did Levi even buy that?!?

Satan ended up getting in trouble for enchanting their outfit to give them REAL ears and a tail "accidentally..." Lucifer strung him up by his toes, Beel gave him a black-eye, and Mammon still calls him a "perverted cat freak" but it was worth it, he says, worth it!!

Asmodeus 

Oh Beel…

Asmo saw Beel's feelings for the MC coming from a mile away. He didn't even need to confirm it with a sniff check, he had them scented by the end of their first night!

Lucifer, on the other hand, now that was a surprise... 😏

Ask him a century ago if Lucifer would ever consider a human lover, godly mother or no, and he'd have laughed! Yet here he is, giving gifts and sneaking whiffs of their adorable new housemate!

Of course, that's causing some commotion because they're pitted against each other, but Asmo finds it kind of cute honestly. 

Beel and Lucifer aren't fighting, not for real. The whole house knows Lucifer would win in a real brawl, but neither of them actually want to hurt the other… They're far too close for that.

So Beel tosses Lucifer around with kid gloves and Lucifer holds back considerably against Beel. It's pretty much just two brothers who love each other squabbling over the same toy… 🤭

Honestly, Lucifer might have bowed out by now and just let Beel have them but now his pride's on the line… thus an endless tussle between family and the sweet MC is in the middle, clueless to it all!

Tragic, is it not? But it certainly makes things more entertaining around here! (Good thing too since Beel beat him to the punch… If it's a fight against those two, he'll have to keep any of his own affairs with the MC under the radar... 😏)

Beelzebub 

He has claimed this one. Full stop.

For a bit of perspective: when Barbatos needs cooking tips, he calls Hestia. Hestia, the Divine Master of All Things Cooking. Hestia, the goddess who raised this MC… 

Needless to say if they have any magic at all, it's in the kitchen.

If food is the way to Beel's heart, this MC has claimed his heart, soul, and probably all of his vital organs. Their food is astounding!! Always perfect every time and so good it brings him to tears!

It started the night of that first dinner, prepared by MC. He was too busy scarfing down the table to even notice a goddess showed up and then he proposed to the MC with their own pig roast by meal's end!

They said no to marriage, but an instant pact agreement suited him just fine.

Beel didn't waste a single moment before he started treating them like a potential mate, territorial aggression and all, but there was a bit of a catch… He kept the MC totally oblivious to it.

Surprisingly, Beel's can turn the "They're MINE" part of his brain on and off pretty well. He's nothing but sweet and cuddly to the MC when they're around and even with his brothers!... as long as they don't try anything.

The moment he caught whiff that Lucifer might be pursuing them too, it was on. Suddenly the two brothers who almost never fight were in competition against each other! But of course, both have an unspoken rule to never do so in front of MC.

And now poor MC believes it's common for demons to "play wrestle" like puppies and hugs are traditionally supposed to be so hard they could snap spines… 

And it doesn’t look like they'll be backing down any time soon… Oh dear...

Belphegor 

You know what? For once, everything goes exactly to plan for Belphie!

No really, this MC has no hidden powers, no magic horses, not even Demon Nip. They are a helpless, trusting little human who just wants to help their big teddy bear get his twin back!

So, you know how it goes. The charm, the lies, the treachery and all of that. He even gets to kill them!! Oh, happy days!! 😁

Come to think of it, they did smell an awful lot like Beel… But who cares, as long as Lucifer suffers right?? And this whole "living together in harmony" crap fails, right?!

Wrong. 

Beel went ballistic. Lucifer did too, but Beel was what really hurt…

Belphie can safely say that in all of his life, Beel has never physically attacked him. Not once, or at least, not with intent to kill… 

But when the sixthborn's fist went crashing through the wall right by his ear that day, he knew his brother's first instinct was to aim for his head… and his second was to miss, as he still loved him, but only by just a little.

What the hell did he just do??

Thank their father for Barbatos and all the funky time stuff he can do because bringing the MC "back" snapped his angry brothers right out of it. 

Things should have been smoothed over at that point but as everyone was finally settling down for tea, Hestia made another appearance in the House… this time carrying a butcher's knife!

Time fix or no, Diavolo had promised her no harm would come to MC and at least one continuity of them DIED… so punishment was now on Lucifer and the Demon Prince himself!

Belphie, in a rare case of guilt and an expression of brotherly love, offered to take their place since it WAS kind of all his fault. His gesture softened the Goddess of Family juuust enough to lighten his sentence from execution to hard labor.

And thus, the MC had their own housekeeping assistant for a whole year, complete with bitter reluctance and a matching maid outfit! Cat-theme and all!!

He's sending nightmares to anybody who laughs… guaranteed. 😒

[two-sides-halved]

Classic Steven looked between the both of them. Human Steven looked over at the temple door, frozen like a puppy waiting for his owner to come back, like Gem Steven had done for him any time he was out at school or upset in their room, Eris seemed like an upset child being told that Gem Steven had to go pick up the milk and wouldn't be coming back. "How the tables have turned." Classic Steven thought to himself.

He slowly nodded thinking to himself, "Wonderful, everyone uses fine to mean everything's gone to poop." He nodded, "Morning." Classic watched her poor the coffee, her tears falling into the cup. That pang of needing to help smooth things over hit both his chest and the pit of his stomach. He took a deep breath.

"Eris... I know we've started off on the wrong foot for whatever reason that I'm still kinda confused about, but I know that you're not hurting Gem on purpose... he's a bit of a handful sometimes... and yea he can be overbearing like Pearl, or speak with this tone of authority like Garnet or he just acts with his heart instead of his head like Amethyst does on the occasion..."

"Your feelings of wanting to be understood and wanting this freedom and wanting to explore the world are completely valid... but I think you're only taking into consideration only parts of what's going on... at least from my perspective on the matter." He walked over to standing between her and the room. "I know you want Gem Steven to understand you and I can't really say what he does and doesn't understand about you, and maybe that's what he's trying to hash out in the room..." He brushes gently holds her hand.

"Well yea, he does say that he doesn't see you as that girl who's covered in bruises who was bloodied and beaten because she choose to runaway from a loving family... that's going to hurt... it made him think he did something wrong... and he blames himself for a lot of things, we all do... we're all our own worst critic... but I know that he's genuine when he tells you that he trusts you, and its more he doesn't trust this Schrodinger's Lapis you've proposed you're friends with." He paused. "I don't want to sound like I'm saying that it's your fault he's upset, but I do want to preface, maybe calling him names like Lazuliphobe, doesn't help matters when you want to introduce him to a Lapis you enjoy the company off... that's just making him feel like he's already fucking up before he's got a chance to even met this proposed not the same Lapis... also moving in with someone you just met seems a bit like jumping into trouble already, but I can't really tell you that you're wrong for wanting some escape from Gem Steven's constant stress that seems that it's more like a simmering pot in the background or an oven that's actively on fire."

"Eris... when's the last time you've gotten some sleep?" He asked. "I know that sometimes when I don't sleep it feels like the world's against me... maybe a good two hour nap would help you feel better and come at this situation with you both refreshed than you were before... just a suggestion, we can just stay up and talk about other stuff to help you calm down if you'd rather do that?"

Continued | @erisdiamas

"Yes, Human Steven is the vice principal of Little Homeschool's program. He needs his rest and he needs to eat. I wish he didn't have to put more responsibilities on himself, but this is how he takes a little control of his life, and that's making sure this program runs smoothly." Gem Steven replied, as he cooked, hearing the sizzling calming his soul, as well as the pitter-pattering of feet slowly creeping down the stairs. The soft yawns echoing through the hallway, it made him feel a little better about the conversation. "Sometimes all we need to have in life is a little control... I have my own methods of escapism to give me a little control... I've got my games, and I've got mom's room... to help me go over things so I know that they are in fact my fault or not... because sometimes things bother me a little more than they do everyone else... and I know that's a me thing..."

"The fact that it happened once is already troubling... but maybe, you're right about this, maybe it is a different Lapis... and I'm just overthinking things as I am one to do... but I know for a fact, there is a fine line between lying and choosing not to say anything because they can't or they deem it as unimportant, from experience..." Gem Steven replied, he wanted to reassure her that this was coming from a place of worry and concern for her safety but he feels like constantly reminding her would make her sick of him. The boys finally round the corner.

"AaaaaaaaaHHHHHnnnnmmmm... Good morning Gem." Classic Steven said with a sleepy filled yawn as he slowly headed down the stairs, his eyes waking a little more seeing Eris, and waved back with a sleepy wave and warm smile.

"Good morning... you seemed like things were getting heated earlier in the conversation... you both doing alright?" Human Steven asked, as Gem Steven nodded simply in response lovingly making stuffing for the ravioli that he was making on the floured counter top, before gently putting them into a pot of boiling water.

"Yep, just catching up on Eris' time away from home for the last three days... very eventful... very troubling to her poor older brother." He replied with a playful overdramatic huff, before his mood swung back to being annoyed at the sight of that cursed substance, but said nothing since he didn't need to reprimand his brother right that instant since he say that he took it, and started carrying it over to the rest of his stash. "Thank you, Eris. I appreciate it."

"It wasn't a matter of rather Cherry forgave me... I am grateful you all do... it was just I don't forgive myself as easily...--" He stared at her offended.

"I DO NOT HAVE A LAZULIPHOBIA... I literally said through the entire conversation how I didn't like ONE LAPISS... I will admit that my experience with her isn't the most pleasant... and my brother's know how I can be with new people... so forgive me for being worried that you might have been with the one fucking lapiss that I despise because of how she has treated my family and my friends thus far... but it sounds like you're the one afraid that I'll forbid you from seeing her, like I'm some father from a super relatable sitcom, who's forbidding his one and only daughter out of his family of all boys since his wife is gone... is she dead, did she divorce him and leave him with the kids cause they were cramping her indepentant live style of drinking and partying with strangers because waking up to one man for the rest of her live is too fucking mundane for this bitch of a woman to ever want to have in her life... and he's left to raise two sons and daughter on his lonesome so he's even more worried that his only little girl is going to get hurt in that big scary unforgiving world and it'd be all his fault because he cares too much and ended up pushing her right into the dangerous, oncoming traffic of teenage hormones in the form of a bad boy, leather jacket wearing, dickhead archetype with dyed blond hair and kissable lips, who make you feel so special in the moment but so fucking stupid after it all comes crashing down around you. Who wears all the red flags imaginable on their sleeve to everyone else but to this teenage boy in the whirlwind of emotions and hormones that is puberty, all those red flags... just seem like shiny neat quirks on this cool and chill persona, who's only gonna end up breaking your heart the longer you watch this trainwreck of relationship go on because you know that never had any substance to begin with..." He huffed, his face twisting into a grimace as if he felt that personally. "But still you watch because it's just a show and the little people on tv can't fucking hear you scream he's gonna break your heart for that new more attractive looking toy on the shelf." He brushes his fingers through his hair and takes a breather.

"Like I said before, I don't have trouble trusting you to know what's right from wrong, it's just the company you choose to keep is what I question... same goes for this dork over here." Gem Steven replied as he gestures to Classic Steven. "So if there's this big announcement can it at least wait until after today... I don't think I can handle any big things other than you three and your birthdays... for once I actually want to relax and spend the day, not doing party prep... I know big shocker, Gem Steven wants to have a good time on the day that makes him feel like the worst person on the face of this timeline... but god forbid I have strong feelings, if I could turn them off I would but good god I can't turn them off even if I wanted to... I can pretend nothing bothers me, but you all would know there's something wrong..." He chuckled through his tears, before looking over.

"Why are you all silently staring at me... am I becoming incoherent and corrupting??" Gem Steven asked before Human Steven spoke gently. "No we were all just listening, and I'd like to tell you the pot of water is about to boil over." Gem Steven quickly refocused on his cooking, and whipped up the food in a lovely display of his cooking skills. "Right... right... I'm feeling a lot better now that I am no longer a dam waiting to burst... but seriously... I think we need just like one god damn day where things don't go down the toilet from minute one... please..."

[daikushiji]

hellooo can i request hcs of oikawa , suna and iwa s/o posting a video on their tiktok of both of them doing something cute tgt with the caption “i’m gonna marry this man someday” . and it went viral but the boys didn’t know the s/o posted it and they found out through their fyp or their friends etc . can i have their reactions to it ?💕

"I'm gonna marry this man"

pairings: oikawa x reader, suna x reader, iwaizumi x reader

a/n: hiii omg thanks for the request bb, i love this idea aaahh it’s so cute!! hope you like it <33

[part 2 and part 3 here!]

Oikawa Tōru

scrolling through your gallery, you spent the night watching some videos you took of oikawa and his nephew takeru

your favourite was the one where your boyfriend taught him how to serve

placing his little hands and feet in the right position, oikawa held the ball to show him where to hit it

every time takeru did a good serve, oikawa ruffled his hair praising him

all fun and games till they started bickering about who was the best volleyball player

with his tongue stuck out, oikawa’s face contorted into a grimace

while his nephew just looked at him with a stoic expression and his arms crossed 

out of nowhere, oikawa pulled takeru over his shoulders, saying that he had to admit that his uncle was the best or he would have dropped him

poor takeru was clinging to oikawa’s head for dear life

“put me down!”

”you have to say it first”

”yeah! you’re the best!”

but before takeru’s feet touched the ground again, oikawa was nuzzling his face into his nephew's cheek

you posted the video on father’s day as a joke, saying that your future husband was going to be the best dad ever

little did you know he would see it on his fyp the next morning 

”darling, you know you have to propose to me first right?”

he teased you the whole day, calling you his future spouse and telling you about your family together

”how many kids do you want? six are enough for our personal volleyball team, you know. and a puppy! oh yeah, we should adopt a dog for the kids to play with”

”i changed my mind, i don’t want to marry you anymore”

”what are you talking about? we already have so many kids and even a dog to take care of, you can’t back off now”

”takeru’s right, you’re so lame” 

Suna Rintarō 

when you posted the video your boyfriend sent you, you didn’t give much importance to the thing

suna sent you stuff like that all the time

videos with him in the background saying ‘it made me think of you’

cute photos of plants and animals, even songs

(but honestly he really enjoyed sending you weird buzzfeed quizzes and memes)

in the video you posted, suna was saying that he had to film the sunset because he knew you would have loved it

and ofc your followers went feral

when atsumu saw the video on his fyp, he showed it to the entire team calling him a simp

suna barely lifted his gaze from the phone when the devilish twins started to stare at him

“what?”

they both had an annoying grin on their faces

”so? when it’s the wedding?”

”hey ‘tsumu leave him alone, maybe he’s sending a video to y/n even now”

together they really were insufferable

after they showed him the video you posted, those two expected suna to become a blushing mess

surprise surprise, he didn’t bat an eye

”suna you’re no fun”

but when he sent you the screenshot of the tiktok, you knew what was going to happen next

“i want WAP as our wedding song and we absolutely need a theme, let me think about what costumes we could wear”

he spent the rest of the day telling you about the worst wedding ideas ever

”oh and can the miyas be our flower boys?”

Iwaizumi Hajime

everybody knew he wasn't really the type to show PDA

but whenever he saw you, iwa was quick to drop everything to greet you with a hug

one time he literally dropped the volleyball net on his teammates when you entered the gym

was he carrying some heavy books when you called his name? ops not anymore

he would have shoved them into oikawa’s arms to come and say hi to you

so after filming him for a couple of weeks, you made a compilation of him hugging you and posted it on tiktok

as soon as oikawa saw his best friend on his fyp, he couldn't control himself

”iwachan! why don’t you ever greet me like this?”

”you’re lucky if i say hi to you”

”mean! i don’t understand why y/n want to marry you”

and then he noticed the caption

when you met up with him that day, his cheeks were flushed

engulfing you into a warm hug as usual, he immediately buried his face in your hair

you squeezed the back of his neck, softly giggling in his ear

”hey love, what’s wrong?”

”i saw the tiktok you posted”

”oh! i’m sorry if it made you uncomfortable, i can delete it right now”

”it’s not that...”

he started to mumble something under his breath

so you gently tilted his head back to make him face you

leaning against your palm, he finally found the courage to meet your eyes

”I just can’t stop thinking about the day i’m gonna marry you”

[jarofstyles]

neighbourry part two please!!! pretty please!! 🍒🍒🍒

Hehehe… here we go.

It’s pretty👀 even without true smut.

If you like this, check out our Patreon!

—-

“Kiss?”

Y/N looked at Harry with slightly wider eyes, confusion in them. He wanted to kiss her? Spend time kissing her? In general? What rhe fuck was this dream mixed with nightmare rain?

He couldn’t back down now. He swallowed, nodding and keeping his face calm. “I- yeah. Kissing. Can be fun… and not let ya focus on the rain. Y’know?” He trailed his fingers over her jawline, watching her face carefully. He wasn’t going to push. If she didn’t want to, he would take the rejection and feel embarrassed about it later. But he had to make some sort of move.

He had been a little bitch about it for years and he knew that it was a bit fucked up of him for wanting it this badly and not being fully transparent but he hoped he wasn’t alone in that.

��It wouldn’t be weird?” She felt her heart pounding in her chest at the idea. It wasn’t like she didn’t want to- of course she fucking wanted to. Have you seen his mouth? She had been aching to do that for years. But it spooked her. It really did.

They’d been close since they were younger. Being close wasn’t exactly a new or unusual thing at all. In fact, the pair seemed to gravitate towards one another every time they got the chance. Their parents saw it, their friends saw it, and it was often teased that they’d end up together. But it dawned on her that Harry never really denied it. Simply rolled his eyes or smirked when Y/N would huff.

Harry’s eyes didn’t leave her face as he carefully examined her expression. He knew her so very well, and her emotions were always very much evident on her face when she did have a thought. Simply from the shock alone, he didn’t pull back and let her work through the thoughts. She didn’t hate the idea, she didn’t truly recoil, but it obviously made her blink a few times as it settled in.

“No. Why would it be?” He whispered, grazing his fingertips back over her chin. Keeping himself calm was the best thing he could do despite the thundering in his chest. This was something that could change them but… he didn’t want to think about it right now. He wanted to kiss her.

“I don’t want to make things weird, H.” She whispered, fingers playing with the collar of his shirt. Her eyes avoided his for a moment before looking back up at him with a soft little pout. “It’s not that I don’t want to but what about-“ she was cut off with his thumb pressed to her lip, eyes widening as they crossed to see his finger and then back to his.

“So you do?” He confirmed. His own breathing was a tiny bit heavier as he watched her nod, a tiny smile rising the corners of his mouth. She didn’t make an attempt to move his finger, staying still with the exception of her fingers toying with the worn collar of his shirt.

So she wanted this.

“It doesn’t have to be weird, angel.” His thumb gently pulled her bottom lip, dragging it down just a little bit. It was so warm and soft, beautiful fucking mouth that he spent time thinking about. Much too long thinking of for a best friend. He knew that much.

“We can just… have fun. Y’know? We don’t have to make it a huge deal…” it was. It was a huge deal and he knew it but they both wanted it and she found herself nodding again.

Another rumble of thunder made her tense, pushing herself further to him. She fucking hated storms, but loved that she got an excuse to be all over him like this. Got to have his hands on her… and now he was offering kisses.

“Okay. Okay- yeah. I want to.” Her voice was tender with the tiniest bit of fear but true desire. Their faces had gotten closer as Harry decided not to rush into it. With the thunder rumbling, he hushed her and gently nudged her nose with his own as his hand finally finished its tracing work and held the side of her face.

“Shh. S’alright. Just focus on me.” He cooed. “S’gonna be good. Yeah? Kissing is fun, isn’t it?” He didn’t wait for her to reply before pressing his lips to the very corner of her own. His body was buzzing as he pulled back just enough to speak. “Just relax for me. M’always gonna take care of you. Always have, always will.” He pressed a slower kiss to the same spot, smiling lightly when he felt her exhale slowly.

“Yeah… I know.” She sighed, body burning with an unusual warmth. The spot he had kissed felt like a new mark. Surely she shouldn’t be reacting to such chaste kisses with the heat she felt swelling deep in her belly? Then again, the lingering tension the two had was always going to come to a boil. It was inevitable.

“How’s that?” He asked, moving to kiss the girls cheek. “Can I fully kiss you yet, angel?” Waiting for permission was a bit more nerve wracking than he thought, but he was pleasantly surprised with how quickly she nodded, their noses bumping again.

“Good. Jus… do what you want. I’ll distract you.”

Their breaths mingled as they paused, his face closer to hers than it had ever been. The anticipation was killing her. It seemed like hours as he descended his lips, pressing them fully to her own.

It was like everything else melted away. Y/N feeling his soft, slightly chapped lips pressed against hers for a few moments before pulling back for a single moment, going right back to her. It was gentle. Tender. Sweet. His kisses smoothing over her lips as his fingers held her cheek as if she was the most precious thing to him.

They stayed like this, repeating the actions over and over. Y/N let him be in control but puckered her lips to meet his. Her fingers tugged lightly on his shirt, feeling like she wanted to be closer to him. As if this wasn’t good enough.

He did the opposite, pulling back from their embrace for a moment, smiling lightly when a tiny little whimper from their loss of his lips came from her own. Y/N opened her eyes, a little dazed as she looked at his green eyes. They were different. Darker, maybe.

“Still good, sweetheart?” His words were whispered, barely there. Her fingers tugged him closer again as she nodded, this time gaining a little confidence and pulling him back towards her.

Harry was a little shocked but eagerly went back at it. His mouth connecting with hers again, soft sounds of their lips embracing over and over again filling the room. Whatever show was on in the background and the rain was hitting the windows and roof, but the most perfect noises came from their kisses. They got a little deeper, spit slicking their swollen lips as Harry gently lifted himself up a bit and gave a better angle for them to continue.

The taste of sweet mint and his sugary soda he had sipped on the way here coated his lips. She could only barely taste it but Y/N found herself itching for more. His hands were so respectful, laying under her cheek and the other over her arm, roaming up and down. She didn’t have a ton of experience with kissing or making out- that was more Harry’s area of expertise, so she felt a little embarrassed- but he was a very good teacher.

Feeling her frustrations, Harry shuffled a little bit closer and moved the hair from her face, taking the hand from her arm and laid it on the side of her neck. His thumb was sneaky, rolling over the pulse point to find out what she liked. None of his past kisses or ventures ever made him feel this… odd. In a good way.

“Can y’open up a little for me, angel? S’that something you’re alright with?” Her eyes didn’t open at his words, merely nodding again quickly as she surged forward and kissed him again. It spooked him for a second but ultimately? turned him on a little. Obviously, she was enjoying this just as much as he was.

Her hands decided to be brave, hesitantly moving to his hair and pushing it back. Her fingers carded through it, ever so gently tugging by accident. It went straight to his cock.

Harry grunted, the action making his half stiffy pulse. How she managed to get him to be so… needy during just the beginning of some kisses was unreal. That was y/N though. She managed to exceed all his expectations he ever had for women. It’s just the first time he had gotten to be around her the way he wanted.

“Sorry!” She squeaked, pulling back from their kiss. Their lips were slightly sticky with whatever leftover gloss she had- watermelon, he knew- and their spit, eyes widening af the throaty noise her best friend had let out. Harry didn’t let her get too far though, tugging her right back into a harder kiss. Fuller. His teeth grabbed her bottom lip, nibbling on it a little bit as his hand pulled her closer to his face while he tugged lightly on it.

“Don’t apologize.” He panted. “Felt a bit too good.” Harry was always affectionate with her. He made dirty jokes and they would joke around about sex, but actually… hearing one of those noises? Knowing what he liked? It felt so odd. “But maybe… don’t do tha’ today. Cause m’Gonna get all worked up, and we jus’ Wanna kiss a little.” He nosed at her like a puppy, pecking her swollen lips. “Right?”

If she wanted more… he would ever, ever say no. That would change a lot, but he wasn’t going to say no to it. He wanted her, damn it.

“Jus’ kissing, H.” She promised, returning to her position close to him. Their kissing was paused, his necklace chain taken in her hand as she played with it. It was a comfortable silence, Y/N tucking her head into the crook of her neck. Her panties were wrecked. Absolutely obliterated. If he even spread her legs, he could probably taste it in the air. It was a little embarrassing but more so frustrating. Her poor cunt was aching for some touch that wouldn’t come until Harry was sound asleep and she could get to the bathroom.

“Okay.” He settled back in, taking this as a break in their activity. His mind was fucking reeling though. Did she like it? Did she ever want more? Did she feel the same as him, hungry to touches and just as needy? He thinks he didn’t read it wrong. Surely she wouldn’t be laying like this and cuddle him if she didn’t. “Did you….” He paused to swallowed, looking up at the ceiling. “Did you like it? Was good, right?” His nerves were getting the best of him though. He so desperately wanted to do it again. To have permission fo do it whenever.

“Mhm.” She nodded against his warm chest, stretching her leg over his thigh. “I did. I… I want to do more of it, maybe. Just need a breathing break.” Her voice was delicate and a little raspy, making him melt. She didn’t seem upset or hesitant. Just a little… effected.

“Can do as much as you want. Got the whole night… but I did get you some food. Need to eat.” He tucked some hair behind her ear, allowing himself to kiss the side of her temple. It was allowed. Right? He thinks so.

“M’kay. Will eat but… this stuff… kissing…” she brought it up again. “Is it just for tonight?”

Boom. The question that was on her mind. Harry froze for a second, hoping he hadn’t read it wrong. Her tone didn’t indicate either way, and he took a breath before replying honestly.

“No. If you want to like…‘do it more than today? We can. We can do as much as you’d like… as often as you’d like.” He tried to calm himself so she didn’t feel his heart go harder. “I liked it a lot. Would be a little sad if we only did it once.”

Despite how unclear it was for their feelings, he thinks this may be a good gateway. Getting them closer to the spot he hopes to get to. Her smile could be felt growing against his thin shirt before she pulled up, initiating another longer kiss that had his fucking head spinning.

She was so good at that.

“Okay. Youre Gonna have to be patient with me though.” Her gaze through her lashes made him want to groan again. “Haven’t had nearly as much experience as you do.”

Selfishly? He was glad. His kisses didn’t mean Jack shit compared fo what this was. This? This was a dream.

“Good. I’ll give you whatever you want… teach you whatever you want to know. You’re always callin’ me your ‘simp’ or whatever. Guess I am.”

Her giggle lifted his heart, making his own dimples break out of a smile as he leaned back over and pecked her cheek. “Enough of that.” The thunder wasn’t done yet, but he noticed she hadn’t even flinched. Was that him?

“Alright. Then why don’t you show me how to kiss better?” As if she needed the help.

[beenovel]

A Frankly Hilarious Misunderstanding

Pairing: Kili x gn!reader

Word count: 2,103 (.... I have nothing to say for myself)

Warnings: none, misunderstandings for the purposes of comedy, not angst

Summary: Some minor human/dwarf cultural differences lead to major confusion. (AKA Kili is a himbo that doesn’t understand human customs)

A/n: This was a random shower thought that made me laugh until I slipped and @claraofthepen encouraged me to write.

Thank you to @claraofthepen @elvish-sky and @messiambrandybuck for beta reading!! Y'all are the best <3

Brief background: Y/n and your brother (Will) are humans that Gandalf brought along on the quest. Don’t ask me why, the spooky old wizard is mysterious. In your culture, it’s traditional for the courter to ask a courtee’s older relative if they can court. This will be important later. Also, homophobia isn’t a thing because I said so.

-

You lowered yourself onto a log by the fire with a grateful sigh. After a long day of walking, the thought of a hot dinner and sleep (even on the hard ground) was a relief. Thorin had called for everyone to stop right as the sun neared the horizon. This meant you’d had enough light to set up for the night much faster than normal.

Kili sat down next to you. He smiled and despite your exhaustion, you returned the gesture on instinct.

“Here,” he said while handing you a bowl of soup. You knocked your shoulder against his in thanks.

You, Will, Fili, and Kili had become all but inseparable over the past few months of the journey. Being so close in (relative) age, you all got along very well. You and Kili had grown especially close. He flirted with you non-stop and you had quickly fallen in love with him.

The only problem was that while Kili flirted with you quite a bit, he also flirted with everyone. Including your brother, though only occasionally. You were waiting to be sure he actually wanted to be with you, but if he made you wait any longer you were going to ask him despite your doubts. Patience is a virtue, but virtues are overrated anyway.

You looked across the fire to see your brother all but sitting on Ori. Dori did not look particularly happy about this. Your brother, on the other hand, was giggling like a ditzy maid at something Ori had said. You could see how happy Ori was at having made Will laugh, as he was looking at him with a small affectionate smile.

You wanted to walk over and smack their heads together for being so obtuse. Everyone could see how much they cared for one another but they were both too nervous to do anything about it. You had seen your brother face down a lone warg with nothing but a handful of dirt and a stick. And now he quailed at the thought of admitting his feelings for the quiet scribe. Ori seemed convinced that someone as brave as your brother could never love someone as quiet and shy as him.

You shook your head lightly in exasperation. Will had forced you to listen as he lamented his 'unrequited love' countless times. Despite your many, many (many) attempts to convince him otherwise (and all evidence to the contrary) your brother resolutely believed that Ori could never love him the same.

You thought back to the other night when you’d both been on watch.

“I’m just some human,” Will had said as he looked over at Ori’s sleeping form like a kicked puppy. “How could he ever feel the same?”

You had rolled your eyes then and you rolled them again now. Will often told you that one of these days you were going to roll your eyes so far back into your head they’d get stuck. He hadn’t particularly enjoyed it when you strongly insinuated that it would be his fault.

You were so distracted by your brother and Ori, you didn’t notice the nervous breakdown Kili was having right next to you. He was staring into the fire with some intensity while silently moving his lips to the thoughts in his head. His hand was deep in his pocket, worrying a courting bead.

Fili (who no one was paying attention to unlike you, Kili, Will, and Ori, who had the entire company's attention split between the four of you, with varying amounts of exasperation) was watching Kili with much the same expression you were watching Will with. After a moment he leaned over to his brother and whispered in his ear so that only he could hear.

“Go ask, you know what the reply will be. I’m growing sick of watching you two dance around each other and if you don’t ask soon, I'll ask for you.”

Kili turned to Fili with wide, concerned eyes.

“You wouldn’t.”

“Want to bet?”

Kili really didn’t.

Kili turned to you and gently placed his hand on your arm, pulling you out of your (by this point slightly murderous) thoughts.

“Take a walk with me?”

You smiled brightly at Kili.

“Alright”

Kili leads you to a stream the company had stopped near earlier in the day. He was silent the whole way and while silence between the two of you was usually comfortable, you couldn’t help but notice how nervous he seemed.

“Everything all right?”

He smiled.

“Of course Y/n!”

He still seemed nervous but you figured he would tell you when he was ready. You soon came to the small stream and sat down on a fallen log beside it.

Kili took a deep breath and turned to you.

“Y/N, for months I have been quite taken with you.”

The boldness of Kili’s words and how suddenly he said them took you by surprise. Kili, upon seeing your expression, hastily tried to amend his words.

“What I meant to say, erm, is that I’ve fallen in lo-” Kili coughed “I mean, I would like— Mahal Damn it give me a moment.”

Much to your giddy amusement, the young prince stopped his ramblings and took a breath, gathering himself before he spoke again. His voice was level, though his hands still fidgeted and his eyes were downcast.

“(Y/N), your mind and your beauty have enraptured me. I’ve never met your equal in wit and kindness, not in all the years I’ve been on Middle Earth. I ask for your hand in courtship, if it would please you, for it would surely please me.”

The prince glanced up at you and saw the tears in your eyes. His own widened and he began to pull away as he backtracked.

“However, if you were to refuse me, I would understand… I shouldn’t have assumed you felt the same… I mean, I’m so sorry-“ you interrupted the prince's ramblings by throwing your arms around his neck.

“Kili I would love to court you!”

Kili pulled back just enough to smile at you.

“So you’ll let me braid your hair?”

“Of course! Isn’t that pretty much the same thing as asking me to court you?”

Kili nodded.

“Then I’ve already said yes, you silly dwarf! …. Though my brother might be a bit upset.”

Kili frowned and remained silent for a moment before he asked

“Why? I thought he liked me.”

“No, no he does! It’s just, well, you were supposed to ask him first.”

Kili looked at you for a moment in obvious confusion.

“Kili? Are you alright?”

That seemed to break Kili out of his thoughts and he gained a look of determination. He quickly got up and began striding back towards camp.

You sat on the log for a moment looking after him in disbelief before getting up and jogging after him. You caught up to him and moved in front of him to block his path.

“Kili, Kili stop. Where are you going?” You asked him breathlessly.

“I’m going to ask your brother,” Kili said, clearly confused.

“We can do that later, my love.”

Kili took your hands in his and looked up at you.

“If it’s an important human tradition then I would honor it. Your culture and customs are just as important as my own.”

You wanted to argue further, but he was being so sweet and thoughtful you only sighed. You could also tell this was something he was going to be stubborn about.

“Alright.”

You hadn’t even finished speaking before he resumed dragging you back to camp.

You got back to camp and Fili turned to you with a big smile, which was quickly replaced with a frown at his brother’s intense expression.

Kili quickly walked up to Will and got down on one knee in front of him. Will looked over Kili’s shoulder at you and you shrugged. He turned back to Kili when he started speaking.

“Will, would you do me the honor of courting me?”

Will blinked and your jaw dropped. Silence fell over the camp. Everyone looked either at Kili or each other in bewilderment.

Ori stood up beside Will and glared at Kili so intensely that he’d have died on the spot if looks could kill.

“You knew I was going to ask him to court me! How could you?!”

Your brother (who had been looking at Kili like he’d grown a second head) turned to Ori quickly.

“Wait what?”

“Don’t ask me, it’s some sort of human custom!” Kili said.

You, Will, and Ori all began talking at once.

“Why would you - talking about - FIGHT YOU FOR HIM”

Will turned to Ori with an “Again, what?!”

Kili turned back to you with a fearful and very confused face.

“You said I had to ask him first.”

You blinked at him for a moment then burst out laughing so loudly Oin fell off his log.

The rest of the company stared at you in shocked silence for a moment before Will asked you (or maybe just the world at large) a question.

“What’s going on?”

Unfortunately, you were laughing too hard to reply and poor Kili didn’t understand any better than the rest of them.

Dwalin looked at Ori (who had turned a brilliant shade of red) and then moved to stand between Ori and Kili.

“Kili I think you’d better explain what happened when you and y/n were in the woods before Ori bursts a blood vessel,” He said

By now your face was starting to hurt. Kili looked at you in worry before he began.

“When I proposed Y/n said,” Kili paused here and turned his eyes to the sky as he tried to remember the exact wording “Of course, but you have to ask my brother first.”

Will started laughing too, and by this time you were lying on the ground near passing out from lack of oxygen.

Bilbo came to Kili’s rescue as most of the company was doubled over laughing now, having realized what you meant.

“I think what y/n meant was that you have to ask Will for permission to court. Not that you have to ask him to court you.”

You vaguely nodded as you continued to wheeze on the ground.

Eventually, you stopped laughing long enough to get off of the ground and you wiped your eyes. Kili gave you a slightly betrayed look as Fili used your shoulder for support to keep himself from falling over.

Will had managed to pull himself together long before you, so he was only chuckling when he said “Kili, I give you full permission to court y/n.”

He got far more serious as he turned to Ori who was now calm and growing shyer by the second.

“And I would love to court you, Ori.”

Ori smiled and nodded and they went off to the edge of camp to braid each other’s hair.

You noticed Nori was having to nearly physically restrain Dori from storming over to them.

You turned to a bright red Kili. “Aren’t you supposed to be braiding my hair?”

Kili took your hand and slowly began leading you to the edge of camp.

He sat behind you and while you expected to feel his hands in your hair, you didn’t.

“Kili?” You asked.

When he took a moment to respond you turned around to look at him. He was looking at your hair with a strange mixture of longing and sadness.

You sighed.

“Kili, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to laugh, I-“

“Are you sure you want to court me?” He cut you off “I would understand if you didn’t, I mean I pretty much ruined the whole thing.”

“Kili” you whispered as you put your hand on his cheek.

“There is no one I’d rather be with,” you said.

“And besides, just think what a wonderful story this will make,” you said with a smile “plus if you hadn’t, Will and Ori might not have ever gotten together.”

He barked out a laugh.

“Those are very good points, ghivashel.”

“I know, I’m the one who made them.”

Kili pulled you in for a soft kiss. It quickly got more heated and your whole body was screaming for you to climb into his lap. Sudden whooping (from the company members) and exaggerated gagging (from Will and Fili) reminded you that you had an audience.

You lightly slapped Kili’s knee and said “get to braiding” as you turned back around.

He did and you reveled in the feeling of his fingers twisting in your hair.

“Now, tell me what ‘ghivashel’ means.”

-

-

Tag list: @elvish-sky @kumqu4t @anjhope1 @thewhiteladyofrohan @claraofthepen @dat-pan-dwarf @messiambrandybuck @shethereadinghobbit @cassiabaggins @animallover81

[loxare]

Today I have wonton soup and perogies.

Why specifically battery operated? Feels vaguely Pratchett-y, but in reverse (you don't really need much to summon Death himself, just a bit of mouse blood and a stick, but the pageantry makes the summoner feel better)

A don't tell them that you knew Jane Austen was behind the 1810 diamond robbery as if that wasn't fresh news to you just a few days ago

Side note, I don't remember if I mentioned this last time and I want to eat soup and watch drama, not read thoughts from last time but anyways. Hoping Nina and Maggie don't actually end up together. Not as like, oh they'll never be together, but like. They could end up together. Maybe. Possibly. But for right now Nina especially needs some single time and that's ok. Anyways back to Shax

C stands out so much and I am living for it. It's not just that he's a dark spot on an incredibly white background (ow my eyes), but also he hasn't stopped moving, and heaven is usually so still. Angels move to their places, and then stay there. He's just going and going and going, so many unnecessary movements. He compared the angels to bees but he's the one buzzing

AND HIS OUTFIT IS OFF WHITE AND SHINY. I love that too. Back in the first season, A went to heaven and his suit was blindingly white, as opposed to the nice cream he usually has, so I like that he gets to keep this spot of grey

See, this is the kind of bonding I wish we could have seen from Maggie and Nina earlier. Also, go Maggie 🖕🖕 those demons. That's a whole mood

Shax is voicing a few anxiety thoughts Maggie has had but not all of them and clearly none of the most potent

Oh. Oh no. That counts as permission. Oh dear

I like how the lighting gets less warm bookshop and more creepy horror movie greyscale as the demons come in, but the warm bookshop lighting is still very visible

That poor rabbit ear hair demon keeps getting vapourized. At least he didn't get hit by the Metatron? I feel like that would hurt more

Ugh, I hate Muriel's office. Open plan nightmare while still somehow being incredibly isolating

Heaven didn't delete C's account after he fell aksjdhaia

Armageddon Take 2 gets a solid Nah from Gabriel, so that's good. Love having continued existence

Demons vs fire extinguishers. Exiltingiushers: 5, demons: 0

Yeah, this does seem out of character for Gabriel, I say as if I haven't quickly scrolled past and yet still kinda read the spoilers all you gremlins put on here. He was very Pro-Armageddon last season

Why yes, he is C's emotional support angel, just like C is his emotional support demon. They support each other, that's the point. Although they could do better on the emotional support. Maybe have a Conversation or six

So C was an entire prince of heaven? Dang, good on him. But yes, there is some sort of institutional problem, where asking questions and not killing billions of people gets you cast out

C is so supportive of Muriel. But then again, they do give off that wet puppy vibe where they say things that are so sad that you can't help but try and buck them up. Anyways, erasing memories isn't a kindness

Oh hey, there's the box.

Poor A. His books are so abused. First fire. Now demon skulls

Ah, and that's why his box was empty

Is that a halo?

Oh it is

Poor rabbit demon

Ok so everyone got discorporated. Except Shax. Who is asleep on the couch. What makes Shax different?

This feels like the set up to a joke. Three arch angels, a scrivener and a demon walk into an elevator

And how did these demons get in here? They weren't invited! Do Dukes of Hell get special passes, because I'm pretty sure the arch angels were all invited in the first time

Oh, so that's why the fly

The immortal fly who Jim has tried to crush several times

Does he have to eat it?

OH THIS IS WORSE THAN EATING IT

Gabriel doing a swearing again

Are they. Speedrunning A&C's 6000 years? This is absolutely The Arrangement

Oh no, angels don't have music? Like, they have the Choirs of Heaven, but they don't have just. Regular tunes? Sad

NO NEED AT ALL. They say, right before meeting again. Also, Gabriel. Get better hobbies

Is Gabriel getting tempted by human foods?

Ok so Gabriel can turn every record to Every Day manually, but for Crowley in the Bentley it's just automatically Queen's Greatest Hits.

I love that they have a Song

Ok here's the first lesson in gift receiving. "Thank you." You have a lot to learn, but you're doing ok so far

Is that Furfur by the way or are there two demons with similar hairstyles? If that is him, once again, how did he get in here?

Oh wait, maybe the embassy status of the bookshop was revoked when A declared Halo Wars

HE FIGURED OUT THANK YOU

Awww, they are absolutely speedrunning the A&C relationship

Neither of them slept, so they're going to need that coffee

Oh good, the guy is ok. That's lovely to see

Oh good they're doing actual bonding. Again,n I don't want Nina and Maggie together this season, but this is good set up for next season

C is loving A yelling at all those angels and demons like they're kindergarten students. And so am I

Awwwww. Also, Gabriel, don't know what you're talking about because that sweater is amazing and I want it

"How badly understaffed hell is" said the grand duke of hell to the demon whose legion consisted of 70 demons

I am very interested in this old man with the oat milk latte. Who is he. Does he want to ask for death? Is he going to ask for it next?

Oh wait he's the Metatron. That's why I recognized him. Never mind

I've never seen him with a neck before

Saraquel recognized him immediately. Probably because of the trial recording. Also, does he come down to Earth a lot? He knows how to order a coffee and that's more than I can say for basically every other angel ever, so

Poor Muriel. They're having a rough day

He knows how slang works too

I DO NOT CARE for that look that Metatron gave C

Muriel you didn't even drink the cuppertea, how are you going to do the alcohol

WHAT BOOK IS THAT

Aw, C is helping tidy up after the party

Yes Nina! These are all things I've been saying for episodes now! Also, awww, angel nickname

And more that I've been saying for episodes! They never communicate!! I love these humans. Sometimes you just need an honest conversation

Ok whatever this news is that I've only been partially spoiled on is definitely going to delay their actual heart to heart

The Crow Road by Iain Banks. Hm, never read it. I like the cover though

Metatron is too close to them. Stop looming

Oh, glasses off

NO. DON'T HOLD THE THOUGHT! A! He just! Told! You! That if he doesn't start talking now he's never going to talk and now you're steam rolling over him with things! He was so ready for an honest conversation!!!

Is A a leader? I don't think so because he's spent the last 6000 years avoiding the entire heavenly host and also being an individual. He also does tell people what they want to hear, as the whole Job fiasco showed us, because he didn't actually tell the angels they were wrong, he just tricked them with something they thought was right. I think Metatron is angry at A about the Armageddon thing, is what I'm saying, and doing a Revengeance

Like, these """projects""", if they're anything like the Armageddon project, aren't anything that A would be interested in running! Armageddon Take 2 is still on the table! Gabriel Nah'd it, but Metatron still wants it to happen! A, remember all the things you like about Earth!

Exactly, you don't want to go back to heaven!

You can work with him! Here on Earth!

Oh no. Does C even want that?

Ok so. This is the same system that kicked him out for asking questions. And punted him into Hell, where horrible things have been done to him presumably. Saraquel said that giving Gabriel to Hell as punishment was a possibility. But now he's relatively free and wandering about and looking forward to a nice retirement with his angel and then this? Heaven isn't a reward for him

A really needs to actually Look at heaven. And C needs to tell him about what happened with the hellfire. Because heaven are not the good guys. A should know that from when Metatron said that he does want Armageddon to happen, actually

Technically he didn't say no. He said he'd think about it. There's still time for a no

OH GOOD HE'S STILL SAYING THINGS

Starting off with some understatements. Getting into some really good honesty. Power through this C, I believe in you.

Oh this is getting painful. I'm out of soup and perogies so I'm going to pause and get some ice cream. Ugh, even when they're communicating they can't communicate! I want to tie them to chairs and shove them in a closet until they say everything they're thinking! Anyways, ice cream

"Nothing lasts forever" "I love the bookshop but it's already burned down once and time will eventually claim it. But if I do this thing, I can make a difference in heaven and make things better for everyone"

"No, I don't suppose it does" "Clearly you think our relationship is temporal and significantly less important than this new job that you'll hate anyways. Is that all it took? A promise of power?"

I may be reaching here

Oh glasses are back on

He's definitely hearing "we can only be together if we're both angels" instead of "this position is only good if you're there by my side, restored to the glory I first saw you in"

THERE'S A LOT MORE TO SAY. SAY WHAT YOU MEAN

Ouch

C calling A an idiot, a word he used to describe angels and demons and people who weren't Us

Ouch. One ace tries to copy what he's seen allos do, have the kiss, convince A of his feelings, but the other ace is just hurt by this, this physical imposition of something he may have wanted but not in this context

Metatron You Dick

NO. NO! You do not get to mock the questions! No!

Loving the trend of angels spending time on Earth and learning from it. A, Gabriel, Muriel. Metatron clearly learned how to be a bastard, the bastard

The same Second Coming. That leads to Rapture. The thing that also. Kills all the humans. That one?

Well he needs to stop that now doesn't he

Poor C. All sad and alonely. Just him and the Bentley

Which isn't playing Queen. The Bentley misses A. TAT

Ok so fuck these credits. A is clearly trying not to cry. C is smad. The music is melancholy. I don't need this

Long elevator

And now they're blurred as of looking at them through tears YOU AREN'T SUBTLE GAIMAN

AAAAGGGGHHHHHHH

Ok so thoughts! I still don't know what the point of the nazi zombie episode was! Was it just to show how much they trust each other? Did they actually not trust each other until almost 6000 years into their acquaintance? What? Ugh, I have to wait until next season to find out what the the nazi zombies deal is aren't I? Has A&C just. Left a trio of nazi zombies to run around london, eating people?

We thought the "two thirds of the way through the story break up" was bad in season 1, but this one takes the cake. Painful! Very painful! Especially since they were just about to actually communicate!! Well, C was. Well. He tried. He did ok for a first attempt

I hope A gets to retire soon.

I wonder who's going to play Jesus?

Good omens 2 ep 1 thots under the cut!

CROWLEY LOOKS!!! SO HAPPY!!!!!! MAKING HIS NEBULA!!!!!!!!! I'm so sad he got the wind taken out of his sails. And I know exactly how much trouble he got in just for asking a few questions. Theory: God is omniscient, and as such knew Crowley needed to be a demon to save the Earth. It sucks, but it's growth for both him and Aziraphale, who needed to learn to duck around the rules, and growth tends to hurt. I'm just sad Crowley got hit that hard

Aziraphale only valid landlord???

Crowley ornithologist?????

Wait, why is the mail getting delivered to the Bentley rather than Crowley's apartment? What happened to his plants? Is he just never in his apartment so it's better to deliver to the car?

Record shop coffee shop ff slow burn

John Hamm's john & hamms are on display

This is unrelated to GO but I made wonton soup to eat while watching this and it is very good. Mmmm

Those poor tomatoes

Aziraphale's music interrupted by nudity and amnesia

Oh god heaven still hurts my eye holes. So shiny

No one tell naked amnesiac Gabriel about the existence of twins

Someone get him some pants. Aziraphale please get him some pants not just a blanket. What if he stands up?

Trailer ship bait line is a good line. Aziraphale thinks of Crowley and goes all soft

"The thing" is probably the box that was doing a lot of heavy lifting to keep this show PG, that was also dropped when the door opened and left in the street. Someone should probably go pick that up before someone else takes it

Ah. Good, it's still there

Oh her name is Shax. Neat! I love Crowley's hair swirlies. The ones on top. They're nice

Gabriel's Jim's terrible short term memory will absolutely be remembering Gabriel and not retaining anything else

The reaction to a bit of litter in heaven is killing me

So Crowley is one of those coffee drinkers. Also, if I were the record shop lady, I'd bake Aziraphale a thank you cake

Getting tired of writing out all the names, sk they're just A and C now

Oh no, the coffee shop lady is taken. Poor record shop lady

Blanket toga is not a substitute for clothes

I thought "ask him properly" would lead to some magic angel stuff, not asking more aggressively

ARGUMENTS. I feel like A is playing on the time last season when C left, saying he was going to go to another galaxy (Andromeda?) and then ended up regretting that. To clarify, I'm currently paused so I haven't heard C's response yet so this entire paragraph could become moot

I feel like C's going through some stuff that he hasn't told A about

Man drinks six shots of espresso, spontaneously combusts, gets struck by lightning

The relationship and circumstances around these two shop keepers is so fanfiction. If they don't get together, I hope they can spend the time trapped in this coffee shop bonding and becoming besties. Also, there should be a manual override for the security system. Not having one is stupid, because of things like this. What if they were trapped in the record shop instead, and there was no readily available food? An internal manual override is crucial

I like Micheal's sleeve cuffs

Ooo, disabled angel!

Muriel I hope you get some confidence. And also I want your skirt

Small bit of litter confuses and confounds angels

Oh, wonder why Beelzebub got recast. (Don't go out of your way to look it up I don't care enough to check myself and definitely not enough to inconvenience someone else)

So. The conflict here is that C could give up Jim, get a promotion and that's a problem taken off his hands, but A would be mad at him. Or, he could do not that and risk both him and A getting erased from existence entirely, which will uh, make it so the apocalypse last season did not get stopped. Oh boy

Oh this coffee shop lady does not care for records. At all

Crowley "my bad" actually made me die laughing so that was excellent and also my ghost is now typing this

Oh I do not care for the tone of Lindsay's texts. At all. Nina you deserve better. I do like the format of the texts coming up though. The paper and red pen makes it seem a lot more personal and angry and uh. Not good.

One of those said "remember what we said about mutual respect" and blowing up your partner's phone angrily because they're late isn't respect, which is necessary in the "mutual" bit of mutual respect. I would personally be concerned that something had happened. Maybe walk down and see if they're alright. Assume that their phone had died maybe, idk

A: glasses on. C: glasses off

"You were right" does not contain the word sorry and oh good, A knows that. Oh there's a dance? 👀

Why. Why do they do that. This is hilarious, but I feel like it makes it more difficult to apologize for things if there's a humiliating dance involved. Which also still doesn't contain the word sorry

Jim go back upstairs. Also, why does he still not have clothes?

See, in the trailer, Muriel didn't recognize Gabriel, and I thought that was just because they've never met. Interesting to see that, no, there's an active reason for that

Being persona non grata with heaven means A isn't allowed to do miracles anymore? Or just that the miracles he does are more heavily scrutinized?

Ah, the old "immediate proof that the last thing said was completely wrong" trope. Also, weird seeing heaven with a red filter

Ah. Bit of warning for people sensitive to flashing lights. I don't think this flashes fast enough, it's a hard cut between red filtered heaven and white heaven, with a second or two between each cut. But like. Go carefully. It only lasts for a bit and there aren't too many interesting visuals during it. Right after C says "no one will have noticed a thing", stops when Uriel asks for the alarm to stop

Oh A. Can't stay out of trouble to save his life

All in all, I liked it a lot! I'm looking forward to the hijinks A&C get into, I really want to know why C's mood is so foul rn when he was generally cheery at the end of last season, or as cheery as he gets, wondering about all the empty boxes. One empty box is fine, but two? Suspicious. Hoping Nina dumps Lindsay, has a nice long recovery period where she can enjoy being herself, and then gets together with record shop lady, whose name I will remember sometime probably. But I'm out of soup, out of tea, and out of excuses to not pull nails from my wall, so I'm gonna go do that now

[landothemuppet]

Peter or tom taking care of sick overworked stressed and just generally burned out reader please

sick days and an idiot || (t.h)

Word count: 704

pairing: actor!tom holland x publicist!readr

N/A:  okay it's short, but it's the concept of a blurb, am i right? I hope you will like it. I allowed myself to choose the reader's work and include a funny little situation. - lot of love! xx

taglist: @angeliquekalampoka @harryhollandsgirlfriend @cedricdiggorysimpp​ @hogwartsmarvelmommy​ - if you want to be notified of all my future writings you can add yourself in my taglist : here

Fall was your favorite season, but it was also the time when you fell ill the fastest. The reason was simple: you were still stubbornly wearing summer clothes when the weather got cooler. And it only took a few days from the start of October for you to catch a cold. You had a sore throat, you had chills and sweats. No doubt you had a little fever, but the reckless one you were hadn't wanted to check. To top it off, the work was not easy. You had had several meetings during the day for several different clients. You have also been negotiating partnership contracts with several brands. But at the end of the afternoon, you felt exhausted, sore, livid. Your boyfriend came home from a late round of golf and you shivered as the wind blew through the front door.

"Darling, I'm home"

You didn't answer, unsure of the sound of your too hoarse voice. Your fragile health has betrayed you since you have coughed a few times. Tom just had to follow your coughing fit. You were wrapped in a fluffy plaid, cozy socks, your nose was red and your eyes were shining.

"Oh, my poor baby" he pained you.

Your boyfriend approached you to kiss your temple, not without protesting that you were sick. He couldn't get sick too, he had a press tour coming up soon.

"Stay away from me, you can’t be sick"

Tom shook his head before heading to the kitchen. He took out your favorite mug and his from the cupboard, setting them on the counter while he filled the electric kettle and took out the tea. You watched him do it with a feeling of fullness. This man was far too perfect. The brunette then leaned into the bottom cabinet to grab the heating pad you usually use during your painful period. He placed it in the microwave with a cup of water, to heat the object safely.

"How was your day, love?" Tom asked.

"Horrible. One of the brands that sponsors my client has a photoshoot scheduled without notifying us first."

"It sucks ..."

"And you'll never guess but ... I also got a call for a social media affair. One of my clients ... I wouldn't say who" you insisted your gaze on Tom, eyes piercing. "…posted on his Instagram story" you paused, giving him time to realize your words. “a picture of him in the designer room of his next BIG movie, where you can clearly see in the background ... 3 different iconic costumes of his character. "

Tom's eyes widened before swallowing hard and judging by tapping his phone. He got confused in excuse.

"We're having a press conference tomorrow. I don't have the strength to write your speech, but I'll do my best to get you out of your mess."

Tom gave you puppy eyes while still apologizing for it. He hastened to take the heating patch out of the microwave. He placed it against your stomach, kissing you on the cheek, then rushed to the counter to steep the tea in your cups and bring them to the coffee table. He settled into the couch, making you wince at having to move but you couldn't blame him since for the next few seconds you were snuggled against him in a heartwarming embrace. He stroked your head and kissed the top of your head.

"You're lucky that I love you, idiot"

"I love you too, darling."

You closed your eyes to appreciate the affection Tom was giving you. You were pretty sure he would be sick tomorrow, you were pretty sure you were going to have to spend the night writing an editorial line to save your silly boyfriend's ass. But for now, you were in the soft warmth of his arms and he was enough for you.

"How about ordering your favorite food and watching a fall movie before you have to go back to work?"

"Sounds good to me."

Tom pecked at your lips and you melted under his kisses. No, dating Tom Holland was no easy task but you were way too much in love with this man ... and he was an absolutely perfect boyfriend.